JULY 11, 1953

Yes, July 11, 1953--sixty years ago. Back then a loaf of bread cost a mere 13¢, a gallon of gas would set you back only 29¢, and the minimum wage here in the U.S. was 75¢ an hour. This was the post World-War II era, a time of prosperity and hope for many; a time of rapid change and growing families. And on this day sixty years ago, a lovely, young journalist married a handsome, young medical school student. That couple would become my dear parents.

Unfortunately, today, their 60th wedding anniversary, is a difficult day--especially for my mother. I haven't mentioned this on my blog before, but many of my closest blogging friends already know--my dad has dementia, Lewy Body Dementia to be exact, and no longer knows any of us.  So, on what should be a day of joyful celebration--reaching that 60-year milestone, my dad is unaware of its significance...

I'll be visiting my mom this week and we'll make every effort to recall the good memories made during my parents' marriage. One of the best was a family trip to northern New Hampshire which we all took to celebrate their 50th anniversary ten years ago. They didn't want a party--just wanted to celebrate with their four children and our spouses and their nine grandchildren. But, we wanted to include well-wishes from their other family members and friends so we came up with the idea of a memory book which I, as the only non-full-time worker was tasked with putting together. Oh, my, what a project this turned out to be--I had no idea just how many hours I would spend putting together the memory book. A true labor of love!

50th Wedding Anniversary scrapbook for my parents

I sent a letter to each of their friends--past and present--requesting any old photos or special memories they shared with my mom and dad. In the letter, I included a simple sheet of cardstock which I printed with a border and a single word: "Remember" on which each friend could reply. The response was overwhelming--childhood and college friends and long ago co-workers, as well as current friends and family, sent back not only their memories, but wonderful  cards and old photos of my parents, many of which I had never seen before. What a treasure trove!

Remember...

After the scrapbook was assembled, I had to figure out what to put in the blank area on the front of it. I think it was originally meant for a photograph, but I decided to stitch something instead. Simple, right? Well, not exactly--you see, I hadn't cross stitched at all in almost ten years! Yes, I had given it up totally when I was at my busiest--raising three boys who were going in all different directions, working part-time at the library, and overseeing our whole-house remodeling project. I had totally abandoned my needle and thread. Until 2003, that is, when I decided that my parents' memory book needed a bit of cross stitch to dress it up! And that is why I'm showing this to you. If it hadn't been for me stitching this single piece for my parents' anniversary book and rediscovering my love of cross stitching, I wouldn't "know" a single one of you! There would have been no blog, no stitched gifts given and received from around the world, no new wonderful friendships like the ones I've made through blogging over the past 4 ½ years... This little pastel-colored finish started it all!

The stitched heart was from an old issue of a needlework magazine (I'm sorry, I can't remember the exact one) and is stitched on simple white Aida. That is the only fabric I had back then; I hadn't discovered the wonderful world of evenweaves and linens at that time. I changed  the design a bit and added my parents' names at the top (covered for privacy) along with their wedding and 50th anniversary dates. Some little pearly heart buttons adorn each corner and tiny beads are added on the side columns. The piece was a perfect fit for the insert on the front of the album.

I can't even begin to describe all the laughter and tears that filled the room as my parents looked through the album for the first time. Oh, my--I can still picture my dad laughing to the point of crying as he read some of the old stories his friends had sent in. And, of course, that set off everyone else--what a great night that was! Each of us kids and each of the grandchildren made a page, too--so very special...

Believe me, the hours and hours I spent putting this huge book together for mom and dad were worth every second. They've taken so much pleasure looking through it over the past ten years. Today my dad can no longer recall most of the names of the faces who stare back at him, but I think the old photos still bring him comfort in some way.

 Fifty years of memories

Of all the photos my parents have from their wedding day, this is my favorite. They are just so full of joy, so full of hope! Off in that wonderful, big, blue car to their honeymoon in Maine and on to a new life filled with love and laughter, tears and sorrow, compromises and understandings. And they did have a great life together--for so, so many years. I told my mother just last week that we've been very blessed as a family. Up until the past few years when my dad's memory problems worsened, we were blessed in almost every way. 

July 11, 1953--off on their honeymoon!

One of the very last pages I created for their 50th wedding anniversary scrapbook contained a lovely thought on the love a long-time older couple shares:

                                                              

THE BEAUTY OF LOVE

"The question is asked, “Is there anything more
beautiful in life than a young couple clasping hands
and pure hearts in the path of marriage? Can there be
anything more beautiful than young love?"
And the answer is given. “Yes, there is a more
beautiful thing. It is the spectacle of an old man and an
old woman finishing their journey together on that path.
Their hands are gnarled, but still clasped; their faces are
seamed, but still radiant; their hearts are physically
bowed and tired, but still strong with love and devotion for
one another. Yes, there is a more beautiful thing than
young love. Old love."   --Unknown

Yes, old love is a beautiful thing and on the rare occasion when my dad does recognize my mom, it is so sweet and tender.  Every now and then, when she visits him at the memory care facility where he has lived since mid-February, he will hug her as she prepares to leave and say "I love you so much, you little sweetheart, you." Watching them, my eyes fill with tears and I have to look away. For I remember not only what was, but what should have been...

When I'm with my mom this week and go to the memory care center to visit my dad, I won't be saying "Happy Anniversary." That's just too hard on my mom. But, I will be saying... Thank You. Thank you for meeting each other and falling in love and having me and my three wonderful siblings. Thank you for raising us in the safety of a small town where we knew our neighbors and walked down the street to church and up the hill to school. Thank you for teaching us the importance of kindness and respect. Thank you for loving each other and your precious family--always and unconditionally.  I feel very lucky and blessed to have you for parents--I truly do...

July 11, 1953